Well I am feeling it today! I don’t know why, I just woke up this way. Let’s not question it but make the most of it!
When I went for my haircut last month (where has the time gone?) my hairdresser said that the cut and colour would look good with red lipstick and a smoky eye. When I was growing up my mum never wore much makeup so there was no learning from her, and now I’m a grown-up (technically) I mostly only use three products- foundation to smooth over my bad skin where I’m constantly plucking chin hairs out (I’m nothing if not honest in this blog), a bit of blusher so I don’t look like I’m dead, and mascara so you can tell I have eyelashes. That’s it. Can I imagine myself in red lipstick? The idea is a bit scary.
Now I’m at a bit of a crossroads. When I was at school I felt a lot of contempt for my fellow pupils who put so much store in their appearances, and the belief that what you look like on the outside doesn’t matter is a huge part of who I am. I want to explore my ‘look’ now that I don’t despise my own appearance, but it’s confusing me, because I’m not sure why I care (am I vain now?) and I’m not sure what it means. If I’m not interested in attracting a mate then why do I want to look nice? What am I getting out of it? If it doesn’t matter then why am I doing it?
I am absolutely a walking contradiction. I suppose the purpose of this blog is to think things through ‘aloud’ and get my head around them, but also my recent philosophy mostly involves not overthinking things. So where does this leave me? Well I sure as hell don’t know!
Although cruelty free makeup is an absolute minefield with lots of brands having evil parent companies that sell their products in China, where it is the law to test on animals, I eventually found a brand to try called Beauty Without Cruelty. I vaguely remember buying my sister some of their products when she first became vegetarian but a lot has happened since then and my memory’s not all that. Anyway I have two lipsticks winging their way to me in the colours Tangerine 25 and Chilli Red. Is the person who spent most of her life not wanting to be seen really going to be daring enough to wear those colours? Is she going to look like a clown? Only time will tell.
It’s my weekend tomorrow and I’ll spend some time practicing the whole eye makeup thing, because previous attempts at that have not ended well for me at all. However now I’m a bit more interested in these things, and myself, I’m willing to invest the time and effort to learn how to do it. It’s a weird feeling, indulging myself like this. But if it makes me happy and doesn’t hurt anyone else, then why shouldn’t I? Watch this space to find out if I should change my name to Coco or Chuckles or something!
For the rest of the weekend my objective is to simply make the most of it after having such a chilled out one last week. In addition to all of the terrible food I ate I barely moved and watched films most of the time. Don’t get me wrong, it was actually great and I enjoyed it immensely, but this kind of activity has to be a rarity. Let’s face it, sitting on your backside watching telly is not conducive to a happy, healthy life. Like anything, these things are best enjoyed in moderation. I love, love, love books and films, but as good ole Dumbledore said ‘it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live’. Great man, Dumbledore.
Today has been such a good day despite the fact I’ve got work very soon. Bah. I got around to a job that I’ve been putting off since the first day of 2017. Yes really. I do get really sore lips caused by all the dry air and dust at work so a lip scrub (and plenty of balm) is really helpful to me. Lush were sold out of my favourite because they had some insanely popular New Year sale going on, then someone on Twitter told me to just mix sugar with olive oil. It can’t be that easy can it? It totally can! So (finally) I put those two ingredients plus some almond essence in my old lip scrub pot, mixed it up a bit, and it works a treat! It also smells delicious. So thank you Twitter person, whose name sadly I cannot remember.
If today has generally been good, the food has been great! The other day at Asda I picked up a stir fry pack I haven’t tried before, containing butternut squash. I wasn’t sure how that would turn out because when I roast butternut squash it takes an absolute age to cook (though it’s worth it) so what would be the result of 4 minutes in the frying pan?
The answer is that they still have a nice bit of crunch but don’t really taste of much at all. I don’t mind though because my stir frys mostly taste of garlic, ginger and soy and anything that’s adding more goodness to my meal can’t be a bad thing. The more variety the better! The sugar snap peas were a whole different ball game though. Their flavour came through and they were bloody lovely.
Dessert was defrosted raspberries and Quark mixed with a teaspoon of sweetener and 1 tbsp of cocoa powder which is 2.5 syns. It had kind of a cheese-cakey taste to it so I was very happy with that. It doesn’t look all that appetising but I can assure you it was!
In the last couple of weeks I’ve started worrying about whether I’m getting enough protein and whatnot, so I put an average day’s stats into My Fitness Pal. As it turns out I have plenty of everything I need, but I’ve decided I’m going to stop concerning myself with that side of things for the time being. When I’m being a successful slimmer the thing that really makes the difference for me is enjoyment. I love food, so from now on as long as I’m on plan, losing weight and enjoying my meals, then I’m not giving anything else any brain time. It’s a formula that works for me, so I’m going to stop messing around with it.
It is now time to jump in the shower, so I will say goodbye for now.
Thanks for reading,