Not So Bad!

The scary meeting went OK! The top manager geezer I spoke to seemed frank, honest and sensible. Rare traits indeed. Basically it was the best outcome I could have hoped for- as I desk person I’ll only be used in emergency situations (as in if I don’t step in then there’ll be a warehouse full of hundreds of people who can do literally nothing unless I help out). BUT he has spoken to the managers to make sure they do their utmost to prevent this from happening. That was the aspect I was worried about, but if I have any problems I can always go back to top manager and let him know. So it’s looking positive. The thing that’s worrying me now though is how the situation affected me, and it’s something I think I really need to look at. I’m not sure where to start though, so it will require some further thought. I don’t want to feel like that again if I can help it, so some sort of preventative measure or coping mechanism needs to be found. Other than food that is.

After the meeting I cracked on with my work and I felt pretty damn good. The reason for this is that last week I was sick of my jeans falling down no matter how often I tightened my belt, so I decided to wear my newly-fitting size 20’s. This resulted in a lovely night of not having to hoik them up even once. Do you remember broad-shoulder man? We had discussed dieting previously so he knows that I’ve been trying to lose weight, but last night he actually noticed that I’m looking slimmer and said that I look fantastic. This means a lot to me, because this particular chap doesn’t have any kind of tact and just says whatever pops in his head. So sometimes it can be hard to hear what he comes out with, but at least you know it’s genuine. And as a bonus he has stopped offering me sweets, thank god. I find it really hard to resist a Sherbert Lemon… Another lady said ‘hello skinny woman’ as a greeting but the only other comment I got was that I have stinky garlic breath! Well you have to take the rough with the smooth I suppose, and as it happened I did stink of garlic as I absolutely smothered my delicious Slimming World chips and roasted courgette in garlic salt and scoffed it all down before coming to work. That’s actually one of the most prevailing memories I have of my nan- she heard that garlic could help lower blood pressure and used to take garlic capsules. So she was always stinky in that respect!

Speaking of my nan I’m so glad I can say that I’m finally getting my weight sorted. When she was diagnosed with cancer I was doing a really good job of losing weight. Just before she died she told me to keep going, to never give up. Unfortunately I’ve gained, lost and regained huge amounts since then, but even when I’ve been eating like there’s no tomorrow it’s always been in the back of my mind that I’m not doing what she wanted. Right now though I think she’d be proud. And I never, ever truly gave up. not deep down. There’s always been some part of me that believed I could do it, and here I am proving myself right.

This week the plan is to switch up the Speed Foods and increase the Speed Food volume. Yesterday I had a huge dinner, but the only speed was courgette. It was a lot of courgette, but when I was writing it in my food diary it didn’t seem right. So this morning I went shopping and got some Oriental Pears to try (I’ve never had them before) and a few bits I don’t normally bother with, like radishes and beetroot. I sometimes have roasted carrot with my dinner but I’m going to pop some in my work lunches raw, using a cheap-as-carrot-chips spiralizer I picked up for £2. Additionally I finally made use of my mum’s soup maker and knocked up a batch of butternut squash soup for lunches.All the Speed is extra important because for the next two weeks I really want to try for good losses. The date where I visit my sister and have off-plan goodies is coming up fast. There are just two weigh-ins until then, and I’m really pleased that we planned it for a Wednesday. That means there is plenty of time for me to attempt to reverse any damage done and maybe, just maybe, still have a good result the following Tuesday.

Today I am enjoying the fact that it’s a fresh new month, and simultaneously wondering where January went and why it seemed to have lasted forever. In December I had three off-plan days which I bought down to one in January, and I plan to have just the one in February too. I started crossing off on-plan days in November and it’s a real motivator for me. That way if I do slip up it helps to put things in perspective and helps me climb back on the wagon. I’m always excited to get crossing again. I found January quite tough in terms of staying on track but I’ve just had a look back and realised I lost 13.5 lbs overall. Despite this I’m keeping my February goal quite realistic- I aim to get my 4 st award by the end of the month. That’s only 5.5 lbs, so if I stay focused then it will be mine!Thanks for reading,

Hayley x

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