Sapped

Ok, I take it all back. NEVER invite your ex over for dinner! Not because it was weird or awkward or anything, it was actually really nice. The whole time we were together he turned his nose up at any vegetarian stuff I would eat (not that I was a veggie at that point, it’s just that a lot of veggie stuff is SW friendly) and wasn’t interested in eating healthily at all. But last night he tried a selection of vegetarian wares that I put in front of him with an open mind. I was thinking back on the crap we used to eat on a weekly basis. It was usually a gigantic pizza (each), garlic baguettes (each) and a whole tub of Ben & Jerry’s (yep, you’ve guessed it- one each). I must admit that I could put all of this away without a single problem but he would get ‘ice cream belly’ and be in discomfort for the next 24 hours or so, sometimes with him waking up in the night choking on acid reflux. It never stopped us eating that way though. Last night there was no dicky tummy, but despite that he managed to clog up my downstairs toilet!

After dinner we had a cuppa and a Curly Wurly each and while we were catching up he periodically popped to the loo to give it a flush and try to get things moving. There was no joy though, and after we had a laugh with my hula hoop and a few more cups of tea were drunk it was time for him to go home. With the toilet still out of action. Thankfully we have an upstairs one too! He was mortified but I just thought it was funny, childish as I am. He left me with instructions to not look under the lid and give it a flush in half an hour. Which I dutifully did, only for the contents of the toilet to go spilling onto the floor and to cover it in an inch of not-so-pleasant looking water! After a lot of mopping and disinfecting I shoved a load of bleach down the toilet and left it overnight. Thankfully with a little plunging using the mop it finally cleared so apart from needing a new mop now everything is hunky dory. It’s not how I hoped my night would end though!

I’m not feeling confident about weigh in tomorrow as I really, really think that I haven’t lost any weight this week. It’s weird because in one way I feel puffy and when I look in the mirror I see a bloated person looking back, whereas recently I’ve looked at my face and thought ‘hey, you’re looking a lot better!’ But on the other hand I’m sure my midriff is flatter and my waist has toned up a bit. In October last year I had to relent and buy a pair of size 26 jeans, but yesterday I tried on a pair of old size 20 jeans and they only bloody well fit! They were never worn much when they did briefly fit, so it’s not like they had a lot of give in them either. Today I tried on an old size 20 coat, and that fits too. I’m feeling very grateful to myself that I didn’t throw this stuff out even though it’s been clogging up my wardrobe for the last two years. So deep down I know I’m getting slimmer, and I need to remember this if the scales don’t comply tomorrow.

We’ve all heard it before but there really is so much more to weight loss than the number on the scales. Ultimately we need to see the number going down of course, but our bodies are stubborn and refuse to fit in with every single weekly weigh in. Every now and then they just like to throw a spanner in the works. The only problem for me is that every time this happens my brain tells me that an unexpected gain is an absolute catastrophe and since we’ve done everything right this week but still not lost weight, what’s to say it won’t happen the next week? And the week after? Me and my brain haven’t had any evidence of this happening in the last, hmm, 20 years or so we’ve been trying to get rid of our excess weight. So why I’d be so worried about it now is beyond me. I’m clearly not a rational creature.

If things go topsy turvy tomorrow I just need to remember:

  • Physically, I feel great. About a million miles away from how I felt 3 months ago
  • I’ve gone down 3 dress sizes
  • I’ve gone down at least 3 chin sizes!
  • I’ve lost over 3 stone (I sense a theme here…)
  • If I have a gain or maintain for no reason, at some point in the future I WILL be rewarded for my effort
  • I haven’t had to go hungry, not even once
  • This time last year I was dreaming of being the weight I am now, so even if I did maintain for a few weeks it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world
  • Food is no longer the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think of before bed. I’ve found things in life that make me happy but don’t make me gain weight!

There’s another thing I need to do in the coming week, which I try to do regularly anyway, and that’s double-check any Syn values I think know. Some of them I’ve known by heart for years and years, but unfortunately product recipes and Syn values change so it’s worth going back and having a recheck every now and then.

Today I haven’t done much as I’ve just been completely sapped of energy. And despite being awake until 4am I didn’t watch any of the films I’d intended to. The time wasn’t wasted though. When I started writing in this blog regularly I came across another blogger who writes about his quest to learn to live life, which includes his Slimming World journey. His writing is so inciteful and honest that I decided to read his blog from the beginning, which has also bought with it plenty of good slimming advice. He really is a remarkable person and an inspiration, so if you fancy a read check out his website here. Apart from that I’ve just been hanging out with my parrot, who is coming on leaps and bounds when it comes to getting used to scary human hands, and started on the washing. I did think about putting it off as I have plenty of stuff to wear, but my customary weigh-in outfit is in there and currently consists of the lightest clothes I own. If it’s going to come down to scraping a loss this week, despite all of the positive things I’ve listed above, I don’t want to ruin my chances just because I’m too lazy to put a wash on.

I think I’m just dreaming of the new holiday year (I’m completely out of annual leave until April 1st) when I can go on some adventures with my siblings again. I wonder how much easier they’ll be now I’ve lost weight? What new places can we visit? I think it’s time to plan where I want to go so I have more things to look forward to.

Me and My Brother

Me and My Brother

Until next time,

Hayley x

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Sapped

  1. Love the photo 🙂

    Don’t stress the numbers (easy to say I know, but not so easy to do) but instead focus on your AWESOME non-scale victories, and remember that it wasn’t the product of what YOU ate that blocked the loo lol

    You’re doing great – just keep heading forwards once step and one day at a time x

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s