First of all let’s get the results out of the way. This week I lost 3lbs, but I also really confused the weighing in lady. I contacted Slimming World head office this week to get them to transfer my online weigh-in history over, so in group it looks like I’ve lost a stone and a half overnight! I’m really hoping for another 3 off next week. I’d love to get my hands on that 2 stone award.
Now I’ve lost 1st 11lbs in total, I decided it was time to find something (other than the shiny stickers and certificates from Slimming World) to mark each half stone. Eventually I settled on getting enamel pins as then I get to justify buying pretty things and keep myself on track at the same time.
The pin I ordered for the first half stone is still on its way from Florida. It’s an X-Files pin, inspired by a particularly cringe-worthy episode about a man whose tattoo speaks to him, voiced by none other than Jodie Foster. I used to watch X-Files with my mum and dad when I was younger which was great because it meant one day a week I was allowed to stay up until 10pm, but when they stopped watching it meant I did too. Now it’s available on Amazon Prime I’ve been having a catch up and am finally on episodes I haven’t seen before. As a kid I never appreciated how funny they are (which is intentional a lot of the time). The episode my pin comes from is no exception.
Anyway, the pin is of a winking pin-up model with the words ‘never again’ underneath it. It works on a few levels for me. First of all the X-Files connection, but also never again am I going to have to lose this particular 7lbs. Most importantly, never again am I going to lose or gain weight for anyone else. Never again am I going to let someone sabotage me. Never again am I going to allow someone to be so insistent that I eat pizza that they make me cry.
For the next half stone I bought a pastel camera pin, funnily enough from a shop called Hand Over Your Fairy Cakes. Of course I love photography anyway, but it also adds to the collection of two other camera pins I already have.
Finally, I ordered another one that’s quite important to me. Until now I never would have thought of myself as a feminist, but this one particular pin really spoke to me. It says ‘I’m not sorry for you fragile masculinity’ and it makes me think about how a lot of men have treated me over the years. I have countless memories of male friends telling me that they only like women with little feet or would never date someone taller than them. As a women who is 6ft tall and wears a size 8 shoes, I felt incredibly hurt. Not because I wanted them to like me in that way (yes men and women CAN just be friends) but because I thought all men thought such stupid things. I was relieved to find out some years later that lots of men aren’t like that, thankfully.
I work in a predominantly male warehouse, but it just so happens that I’m physically stronger than a lot of them. Do you think they will let me help lift something heavy? Nope! They’ll ask another man, but not me. I also get weird looks if I hold the door open for men. I’m sorry but I’m not letting a door slam in someone’s face just because I have female parts! I was brought up with better manners than that.
So, moving on! This week I’ve been thinking a lot about staying on plan and how I’d rather avoid going off plan for any particular occasion, whether it’s for birthdays, Christmas, or whatever. For me it’s the best strategy, but I worry that other people might think I’m ruining the fun for them. And sometimes I do worry about missing out. But then something occurred to me. I was thinking back on times I’ve been out with friends for meals or whatever and (unless I’ve had a particularly fancy cocktail- I’m looking at you, peanut butter Martini…) I don’t look back and think ‘wow, remember that cheesecake from 10 years ago? What a night!’ I’m thinking about the good times we had or the mischief we got up to. I remember the first time I went out for an Indian meal with friends when I was still at school, but I couldn’t tell you what I ordered if my life depended on it. Life does not have to revolve around food, and you’re not being a party-pooper if you choose a healthy option rather than having a massive blow-out on a night out. If someone else’s fun depends on what you’re eating and drinking, then I really think it would do them good to evaluate what’s really important to them. It always gets me when people say life’s too short to say no to crappy food. I’d say it’s too short to keep saying yes to the things that don’t really matter.